


i saw you close your eyes

by rosebudbois



Category: Carry On - Rainbow Rowell
Genre: Happy Ending, M/M, SnowBaz, fake dating au, fake relationship au
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-03
Updated: 2018-04-10
Packaged: 2019-04-17 16:25:32
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,571
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14192982
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rosebudbois/pseuds/rosebudbois
Summary: After making a bet with Penny that Simon knows he can't win, he's forced to go to Baz for help. The outcome is interesting, to say the least. Oh, and now Simon and Baz are fake boyfriends.In other words, fake dating au because I couldn't help myself





	1. Chapter 1

“Alright, so it’s a bet?” Simon says. He’s sitting on his bed across from Penny. Her legs are folded and her elbows are resting on her knees.

“No, Simon. I told you that I believe you.” Penny sighs and leans forward to cradle her face with her hands.

“But can we make a bet anyway?” Simon looks hopeful and Penny can’t stand his puppy dog look.

“Fine. Just this once. I don’t want to keep encouraging your bad habit.” Penny gives in and glances to their forgotten homework, spread out across Simon’s bed.

After abandoning their homework - despite Penny’s protests - they got into a discussion about… a lot of things. A lot of things that somehow ended at Simon’s love life. Simon made a foolish bet that he could get someone to date him within the week. 

He’s felt weird since him and Agatha broke up, lonely. He has Penny, of course, but there are things he can’t talk to her about, things that are more suited for a conversation with a significant other.

Penny was against it at first, obviously. She argued that it wouldn’t be fair to whoever might end up with Simon, given that he won’t truly like them, but she eventually gave in. He couldn’t actually get someone to go out with him in such short time, could he?

And besides, Simon has a thing with betting. Once he’s set on making a bet, he won’t back down no matter what the stakes are. Penny really should talk to him about it, but it doesn’t seem to be  _that_ bad of a problem yet. She decided to wait until he starts betting money to get concerned.

“And if you win,” Penny continues, “I am not paying you anything.” Penny sticks her hand out and Simon takes it, shaking it excitedly.

“No money. You know I don’t have any to spare anyway.” She lets go of his hand and pushes her glasses up on her nose. “I’ll think about the consequences for whoever loses.”

“Just try to make them fair. I don’t want this to be a repeat of the bet we made 5th year.”

“I will! And don’t worry about that, I don’t want a repeat of that either. Now, leave before Baz gets back and eats you.” He stands up and takes Penny’s hand, pulling her up off the bed.

“Wouldn’t that be a disaster.” Penny says sarcastically. She gathers her things and packs them into her bag. Simon stands up and stretches his arms above his head, dropping them to grab Penny’s hands and pull her up next to him.

He slings an arm over her shoulder and walks them over to the door.

“About that bet in 5th year though, I never  _technically_ lost. So the price still has not been paid” Simon says, reaching with his other hand to open the door. “I never proved that Baz was a vampire, but you never proved that he wasn’t. So it’s really still a current bet, and one that I intend on winning.”

“If you can get him to tell you that he’s a vampire in a way that won’t get you killed, then that bet is still on as well. Maybe we should consider changing the consequences, though.” She gives Simon a side hug and ducks out from under his arm, walking out of the door and down the steps.

He shuts the door and steps into the bathroom next to him, closing it behind him just in case Baz decides to come back early tonight. Looking at himself in the mirror, arms braced on the bathroom counter, Simon takes a moment to contemplate what he just got himself into.

How in hell is he supposed to get a  _boy_ to date him within a week?

—

It’s been roughly 13 hours since Simon and Penny made the bet and Simon has already given up. He couldn’t even find someone who he thought might be interested, and he was supposed to be dating them by the end of this week? Who knew trying to get a boyfriend could be so hard?

They’re at lunch now and Simon isn’t paying attention to what Agatha and Penny are talking about. He’s too busy scouting out every boy in the lunchroom, trying to gauge whether or not they would be into him. His eyes settle on Baz, who is looking at him from across the room as always. An idea starts to form in Simon’s mind but he quickly forgets about it and turns his attention to the conversation happening at his table.

“You know that you can always come hang out in my room, right?” Agatha says. “Yeah, I know. I probably will next time Trixie decides to have her girlfriend over. Yours is closer than Simon’s room anyway.” Penny sighs and nudges her food around with her fork.

“Are you complaining about Trixie and Keris again?” Simon’s not really surprised, it’s the topic of most of their conversations now anyway.

“Yes! They’re just so annoying and they choose the worst times to hang out and -”

Penny continues ranting, but Simon zones out again, his eyes subconsciously wandering back to where Baz is sitting. His back is to Simon and Dev and Niall sit across from him. Almost as if he has eyes in the back of his head, Baz swivels his head to glare at Simon.

Simon doesn’t look away this time and instead lets the idea from earlier form in his head. It’s dumb, and he knows it, but it also might just work. He can’t back out of the bet now, but he also knows that he won’t be able to pull it off without a little help. His plan might just be his way to finally winning a bet against Penny.

—

Simon waits until Baz gets back from practice to set his plan into motion. He does still have until the end of the week, but he wants to leave himself some time in case it doesn’t work out. Which is more than likely, given his history with his dreadful roommate.

He’s sitting on his bed, pretending to do his homework but too nervous to actually do it, when Baz comes into the room. He throws Simon a sneer and goes straight into the bathroom, slamming the door behind him and not coming out for 45 minutes.

When he does come out, he’s in joggers and a t-shirt, his hair wet and hanging in his face, and a pile of dirty clothes in his arms. He throws the clothes into a heap by the wardrobe to deal with later and sits down in his chair, making an effort to not look in Simon’s direction, and opens a book.

Simon waits until Baz is settled, giving himself time to calm his nerves as well.

Once Baz is clearly invested in the book he’s reading, Simon carefully closes his own book and clears his throat, loudly. When he gets no reaction, he does it again. This time even louder.

“Yes, Snow?” Baz sighs and turns his chair around to face Simon, book still open in his hands. It’s one of those chairs with the wheels which makes it all the more dramatic. Perfect for Baz.

“I have a question.” Simon sits up straighter, feeling uncomfortable under Baz’s stare.

“Spit it out, I don’t have all day.” Baz makes a show of slamming his book and crossing his arms.

“Okay. Well, it’s a pretty funny story actually. You see, me and Penny -”

“Snow, just get to the point.” Baz rolls his eyes and swivels back and forth in his chair.

“Fine! Will you go out with me? No! I mean, will you  _fake_ go out with me.” Simon blurts out, putting as much emphasis as he can on the word fake.

Baz doesn’t respond right away, just stares at Simon. He’s stopped swiveling and Simon looks down to pick at his nails.

“Excuse me?” Baz finally says. His mouth is hanging slightly open and did those words actually come out of Simon Snow’s mouth?

Simon sighs and explains the situation as best he can, “I made a dumb bet with Penny last night that I could get a boy to date me, don’t ask why. But I haven’t been able to get anyone to even look at me!” Simon throws his hands up in the air. “I hate losing bets, especially to Penny, and I’m really desperate. We won’t have to, like, kiss or anything like that, I promise! It won’t be for long anyway. We’ll just pretend to be fake boyfriends until we fake break up.”

“Trust you to make a bet like that.” Baz uncrosses his arms and leans forward to rest his elbows on his thighs. “So, what’s in it for me?”

Simon hesitates before speaking, “I hadn’t really thought about that. Nothing, I guess?” he pleads with his eyes though, Baz is his last hope to win this piece of shit bet.

“Fine. But you owe me.” Baz picks his book back up and swivels until his back is facing Simon again.

“Really? Are you serious?” Now it’s Simon’s turn to be confused.

“Don’t make me change my mind.”

“Okay! I won’t. Uh, thanks?”

“Don’t mention it. But do, because you’ll owe me.” Baz rips a sheet of paper out from the notebook on his desk and grabs a pen from his ‘I <3 Edward Cullen’ mug (Simon hates it). He rolls over to the end of Simon’s bed and holds the paper in front of Simon’s face.

“We’re setting ground rules though.”

“Okay. Sounds fair” Simon scoots down on his bed so he’s close enough to see the paper, but not too close. “Do we really need to write them down though?”

“Yes, we need a constant reminder of what is off limits.”

He writes _Rules_ at the top of the paper in his perfect cursive and they begin to brainstorm. Thinking about their own boundaries in whatever mess they’re getting themselves into.

Several arguments later, they have a list:

  1. _Kissing is a big no_
  2. _Hand holding is okay_
  3. _The animosity continues when we are not in public_
  4. _No one can know that we’re not actually dating (even Bunce)_
  5. _Simon owes Baz a favour of his choosing (favour TBD)_



Baz spells it to the wall between their beds and goes back to reading at his desk. Simon meets Penny in the library before dinner, the whole time feeling like he’s just made a huge mistake.


	2. Chapter 2

Simon decides to wait a few days to tell Penny about him and Baz. He knows she’s going to be skeptical and he doesn’t want to make it worse by getting a boyfriend too fast.

The week is almost over when they do make it ‘official’. Which means him and Baz walking down to breakfast, holding hands, and sitting at Simon’s usual table. Penny eyeing them suspiciously from the moment she notices them walk in the door.

“Good morning, Simon. Baz.” Penny nods at Baz when she says his name, but goes back to looking at Simon, demanding an explanation with her eyes.

“Morning, Pen.” He lets go of Baz’s hand and rubs his palm on his pants. He expected Baz’s hands to be cold, like a vampire’s should be, but they’re really quite sweaty. Though maybe that’s just because he warmed them up. It is a long walk from their room, a long time to be holding hands.

Baz just rolls his eyes at Simon’s gesture and nods back at Penny, being careful to avoid eye contact with Dev and Niall who are glaring at him from across the room. It seems they’re also demanding an explanation through eye contact.

“Si? What’s this? If you don’t mind my asking.” Agatha interrupts Penny’s intense stare to gesture between him and Baz with her spoon.

He pauses, realizing he should’ve come up with a lie about how they’re suddenly dating, before Baz cuts in and speaks for him.

“Me and Simon got to talking this week.” He grabs Simon’s hand again, linking their fingers and lifting their joined hands above the table to make a point, “About why we really hate each other, when we realized we really don’t. Boring, sappy things like that. Long story short, we’re dating now.”

“Hm. I can say I definitely didn’t see that coming.” She goes back to eating her breakfast, seemingly uninterested in the fact that her ex-boyfriend is currently dating her ex-crush.

Agatha did eventually get over her crush on Baz, all thanks to the man himself. He (not-so-nicely) told her that he was gay, and completely uninterested in anything she wanted with him. It didn’t take her long to get over him.

As for the gay thing though, he only told her, and she kept it to herself. Baz used to be afraid that Simon would find out and hate him even more than he did before. Mutual ‘hate’ concerning something neither of them have much control over is fine with Baz, but if Simon were to hate him for his sexuality, that would be quite unfortunate.

Though given the current situation, Baz has a feeling that Simon wouldn’t mind Baz being gay.

The students eating breakfast slowly start to filter out as it gets closer to the first class of the day. Baz gives Simon a light peck on his cheek before he heads off to his class, he likes to get there early (force of habit). The kiss makes Simon blush and pout angrily at him as he leaves through the double doors.

Simon continues to ignore Penny’s questioning looks, making small talk until they get to their Greek class. They sit side by side in the middle row and Baz, who usually sits right behind them, is sitting in the seat to the other side of Simon. He must’ve scared the kid who usually sits there into switching seats with him.

Class begins and Simon tries to pay attention, he really does, but Baz has been doing anything he can to distract Simon. Passing him notes that Simon ignores, poking his side to make him twist in his seat, and doodling all over his notebook are just a few of the methods Baz has decided to use to annoy Simon.

And to think that Simon was bothered by Baz simply sitting behind him before they became… whatever it is that they are. Friends? No, they’re not there yet.

Simon eventually gives in, shooting a look at Baz when he won’t stop clicking in his ear, then scribbling some words on a scrap of paper to shove at him.

_What is your problem?_

Baz reads it and writes back in his too-neat handwriting.

_I’m bored. I already know Greek. And besides, I’m your boyfriend now. I’m allowed to annoy you when I’m bored._

Simon rolls his eyes at that, but writes back anyway.

_Well some of us here don’t know Greek and would like to actually be able to pay attention. I’ll only keep talking to you if you promise to catch me up on this Greek stuff later._

Baz agrees to that, so much for keeping up the hatred toward each other when they’re in the privacy of their room. They continue to write back and forth for the rest of the class, mostly about boring, unimportant stuff. Until Simon brings up actual important stuff, that is.

Simon: So, what was that about at lunch? With the dramatic ‘We used to hate each other but we talked and now we’re hopelessly in love’

Baz:  _It wasn’t that dramatic. And you were choking up over there, I thought you were going to explode from having to tell one little lie._

Simon:  _I wouldn’t say it’s little. But thanks, I guess. And oh, are we going to talk about that kiss? What the hell?_

Baz:  _It was hardly a kiss, Snow. You want to sell this thing, don’t you?_

Simon grunts at that, because Baz is right, and stops responding for the few minutes they have left of class. He doesn’t have anything else to say, and their teacher is starting to look annoyed with them.

They pack up their things and leave the classroom, Simon and Penny say goodbye to Baz, whose class is in the opposite direction.

Simon is about to keep walking in the direction of his class when Penny grabs him and pulls him into an empty alcove in the hallway that is slowly getting crowded as the classes let out.

“I wanted to wait until Baz was gone to talk to you.” She lets go of Simon’s elbow and puts her hands on her hips, something Simon likes to call the Natural Penny Stance, “What’s going on between you two? You expect me to believe you two talked and just happened to realize you have feelings for each other?”

“I mean, yeah? Me and Baz never really got a chance to  _talk_ , you know. From the first time we met each other there’s only been hate and I honestly don’t understand it.” Simon’s pulling this all out of his ass, but Penny is starting to look less tense which means it’s working. “We finally talked and realized that maybe it was time to stop acting like children with a grudge.”

She grabs Simon’s again and links her arm in his, merging back into the hallway traffic. “Alright, fine. I’ll believe it for now, but I’m still suspicious. And if Baz does anything to you that I don’t like, me and him are going to have a serious talk.” Simon rolls his eyes and laughs at protective Penny. He is lucky to have Penny looking out for him, though.

They part with a hug when they get to Penny’s classroom and Simon continues down the hall to his.

All throughout class, Simon can’t stop thinking about the way his stomach fluttered when Baz kissed his cheek this morning. But it doesn’t mean anything, right? He just plays it off as nerves about this whole fake dating thing. That’s all it is, definitely nothing more.

—-

“Snow?” It’s after dinner and Baz and Simon are sitting on the floor at the end of their beds, practicing Greek. Well, they were practicing Greek. Simon has been zoning out everytime Baz tries to explain something.

“Snow!” Baz waves his hand in front of Simon’s face. That gets his attention. “Could you at least pretend to care about what I’m saying.”

“Huh? Oh, sorry.” He looks down at his homework but none of it seems to be making any sense, and not just because it’s Greek. “Do you think we could actually do this later? Like, tomorrow or something.”

Baz sets his Greek book to the side, turning to face Simon. “As your temporary fake boyfriend, I feel like it’s my duty to ask what’s wrong. But don’t think that I actually care, because I don’t.” Baz puts on his best face of indifference, because if he’s being honest, anything Simon has to say is the most important thing that can be said. He can’t let him know that, though.

“It’s fine Baz, really. And even if something were wrong, what makes you think I would talk to you about it.” Simon huffs, slamming his Greek book and dropping it onto the ground next to him.

Baz just rolls his eyes at that. He stands up and goes over to his closet, putting on a pair of shoes and a coat. He heads out the door to the catacombs, leaving Simon behind to pout under the covers on his bed like a 12 year old.

He’s not  _trying_ to be dramatic, but he’s been thinking far too much and taking his frustration at himself out on Baz. To be fair, Baz is the one at the root of all Simon’s problems.

I mean, how often is it that you might possibly have a thing for your arch nemesis, now fake boyfriend, who is also a vampire? And who would also never, in a million years, reciprocate the feelings. Simon decides this is a situation where help from Penny is necessary, and he makes a promise to himself talk to her tomorrow.

He’ll have to explain the whole fake dating thing, but he’s sure she’ll understand and see the priority here.

While Simon is busy having a feelings crisis, Baz is busy drinking rat blood and being gay.

Of course he likes Simon, everyone can see it (except for Simon). That may even be the only reason why Penny was so willing to believe that their relationship was real. He can’t let Simon know; it would ruin everything.

So, he continues to kill rats and think about Simon until the early hours of the morning, when he sneaks back into Mummers House and falls asleep to the sound of his fake boyfriend’s deep breathing.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry this is a little later (and shorter) than i had planned! a few things came up and i didn't have as much time to write as i thought i would. the next part will be up in a few days and i'm debating whether to do 3 or 4 parts but i'll figure that out when i get there. as always, thanks for reading!!


	3. Chapter 3

Simon wakes up to the sound of the shower curtain being pulled open, followed by the light pattering of Baz’s feet on the bathroom tile.

Simon considers staying in bed and avoiding confronting Baz, but his decision is made for him when he starts to sweat under his heavy blankets. He rolls over and sits on the edge of his bed, leaning his elbows on his knees and rubbing the sleep out of his eyes.

The window was open last night, meaning Baz must’ve closed it when he got back from the Catacombs. Simon stumbles over to the window, still disoriented from having just woken up, and pulls it open, leaning out of it and breathing in the fresh air.

“Morning, sleepyhead.” Baz says from across the room. He throws his towel at Simon, then sits on his bed.

Simon turns around at the voice and catches the towel before it hits him in the face, but throws it on the ground when he realizes what it’s touched.

“You seem oddly normal today.” Simon leans his back against the window sill with his arms crossed in front of his chest.

“You sure know how to flatter a guy.” Baz jokes and pulls on his shoes. Simon rolls his eyes and walks to the bathroom, choosing to enjoy the fact that for once Baz isn’t acting like he wishes Simon was never born.

“What are your plans for today?” Baz yells from the outside the bathroom and Simon ignores him. Can’t a boy go to the bathroom in peace.

Simon answers once he is back in the room, “I’ll probably just hang out with Penny. Maybe visit Ebb too.”

“Boring. Shouldn’t we be together if we want people to actually believe that we’re dating?” He finishes tying his shoes and sits up straight to look at Simon, who is still leaning against the window. 

“I’m not gonna be with her all day. We’ll do something that ordinary boyfriends do after lunch.” Simon uncrosses his arms to put air quotes around the word ‘boyfriends’, as if he needs to remind Baz that they aren’t actually dating.

Baz nods in understanding, instead of responding, and grabs his jacket from where it’s laying on the ground.

“I’ll see you at lunch, then.” He says before he slams the door behind him.

Simon listens to his retreating footsteps until he can’t hear them anymore, then turns around and looks out the window to watch Baz walk to the dining hall. He’s walking faster than is necessary, but that’s a whole thing with Baz. Always walking like he has somewhere important to be; head held high, completely silent besides the quick click of his shoes against the floor.

Simon’s the complete opposite; all uncoordinated movements and loud steps that can be heard across the school. That’s one of the reasons he knows him and Baz could never be together,  _really_ together, in the dating kind of way. They say opposites attract, but that doesn’t apply with these two.

He sighs and finishes getting ready, pulling on Agatha’s old lacrosse sweater and grabbing his bag, like he’ll actually do any schoolwork. He skips breakfast and heads straight to the Great Lawn where him and Penny meet every Saturday. It’s unusual of him to skip breakfast. On any other day, he could inhale the contents of every student’s plate within mere seconds of entering the dining room, but all this thinking about serious things has made him lose his appetite.

He throws his bag down and sits next to it, picking at the bark on the tree he’s sitting by until Penny shows up.

“Why weren’t you at breakfast?” Penny arrives about 10 minutes later and sits down next to Simon, flattening her skirt over her thighs. “I brought you a scone.” She hands him a scone wrapped in napkins and starts pulling books out of her bag once he takes it.

“I wasn’t feeling too hungry this morning. Did Baz sit with you guys?” He unwraps the scone and takes a bite, unable to resist it despite his lack of hunger.

“Thankfully no. I don’t think he’s at that stage with me and Agatha yet. Do you know how terribly awkward that would have been? Especially without you there.” She leans toward Simon and nudges her shoulder into his, giving him a suggestive look. “So, tell me how this thing happened between you two anyway. I want all the details.”

Simon laughs nervously and looks away from Penny’s gaze. Would this be a good time to bring up what he wanted to talk to Penny about? He glances back at her and decides that, yes, this is Penny. Anything he has to say, she’ll be willing to listen. And no matter how dumb it is she’s always the one who will able knock some sense into him.

Simon pulls the grass at his feet and rips it apart, “Actually, Pen, there’s something I need to talk to you about?” He raises his voice at the end, forming it as a question so Penny can turn him down if she wants to, though of course she wouldn’t.

She raises her eyebrows at him in a look that tells him to go on, so he does. But not before sighing and ripping up a bigger chunk of grass.

“I think I like Baz.” He lets out a breath and slowly turns to face Penny.

She doesn’t say anything at first, but all of the sudden she’s laughing louder than Simon has ever heard her laugh before. He gives her a moment to catch her breath, looking at her in confusion through her whole fit.

“Si - Simon! What the hell? I thought we were getting serious here!” She points at him with an accusing finger, “Something we never do, by the way!”

He’s still staring at her, wondering what’s so funny about him just confessing that he may have feelings for his enemy.

“I would hope that you like him. You two are dating after all.” Oh, right. Simon mentally shames himself for forgetting the one piece of information that is the most crucial in this situation: Penny thinks he’s actually dating Baz.

He lets out another laugh, more nervous than the one before, then takes a minute to explain the situation to Penny. She listens the whole time, not interrupting Simon, and to his surprise, not looking that upset about it either.

Once he’s done explaining, she sighs and rests her hand on his shoulder. “Oh, Simon. Trust you to get yourself into a mess this big.”

“Well? What do you think I should do?” She takes a minute to think, taking her hand off Simon’s shoulder and bringing it up to twirl her finger through one of her curls.

“Hmm. Honestly Si, I think you should tell him. I mean, have you seen the way he looks at you! You can’t be that oblivious.” She stuffs her unopened books back into her bag and hangs it over her shoulder.   
“What do you mean? And where are you going?” He grabs her hand as she stands up, looking at her questioningly.

“I have studying to do that I am not going to be able to finish with you moping around. And you have a boy to snatch.” She pulls her hand out of his and winks.

She’s only run about 5 yards away when she turns back to yell at Simon, “Oh, and you lost the bet! Your punishment is that you have to tell Baz how you feel, or you can go to dinner with me and my mum once a month for the rest of the year. See ya, Si!” With that, she’s gone before Simon can register all that she’s said.   
Damn him for not coming up with the consequences of losing the bet earlier. And there goes another win to Penny, making the score 0 to however many Penny has won, he’s lost count.

—-

It’s almost lunch when Simon heads back inside the gates. After Penny left, he stayed outside to think some more. Mostly about how in hell he is going to confess his feelings to Baz, his enemy. And the rest of the time he spent sleeping against the tree.

He loiters around in the courtyard until he sees Baz walking to the dining hall and runs to catch up with him.

“Hey Baz.” He kisses him on the cheek and links their fingers together. If telling Baz goes wrong like Simon suspects it will, he at least wants to enjoy the time he does have left with Baz as his fake boyfriend.

“Hi Snow.” Baz smiles at him. It almost looks real. He really is good at pretending to be Simon’s boyfriend.

They join Penny and Agatha after they get food, and jump right into the conversation.

Contrary to what Penny said earlier, Baz does fit in with them. He always knows the right things to say, and for once seems like he actually wants to be talking to Simon and his friends.

As for Simon, he stays quiet. He’s been getting more anxious the longer lunch goes on, and the closer he gets to having to alone with Baz. Having to tell him how he feels.

He runs through a million scenarios in his head as to how Baz will react.

One of them is Baz lunging at him and sinking his teeth into Simon’s neck, killing him quickly. Too bad Simon wouldn’t be able to win that bet dead.

Another is Baz leaving. Not saying anything, just turning around and walking right out the door. Possibly never coming back.

None of the scenarios that Simon pictures end happily, with Baz being okay that Simon likes him and possibly even reciprocating those feelings himself.

Simon is pulled out of his thoughts to Penny snapping her fingers in front of his face. She’s leaning over the table and her shirt is dangerously close to dragging through the leftover food on her plate.

“Simon? Are you listening? Agatha and I are leaving, we’re going to go to the library. We’ll be there if you need us.” She gives Simon a look that says  _‘we’ll be there if things don’t go well with Baz_ ’.

She must’ve told Agatha, because she looks at Simon with the same concern in her eyes. He would usually be more worried about something like that, but there are more pressing matters to invest his worry in.

“What do you want to do?” Baz stands up and clears Simon’s plate along with his own.

Simon follows Baz out of the dining hall and shrugs. It’s not like he can just casually bring up that his plans for the day are to confess his completely real feelings to his vampire roommate, who also happens to be his arch nemesis.

“Come back with me to the room then, I’m going to practice on the pitch but I need to change first. And as my boyfriend, you have to come watch me play.” Baz slows down so Simon can catch up, and grabs his hand, only to let go of it a second later with a look of disgust on his face.

“Why are you so sweaty? It’s disgusting.” There’s the Baz that Simon knows, snarky and never giving a shit about other people’s feelings. How Simon could fall for someone like that is beyond him.

“Sorry.” He pulls his hand farther away and brings it to his mouth to chew on his fingernails.

“That’s gross too. Why do you do that anyway?” Baz says.

Simon just shrugs, “I dunno. Just a bad habit I guess.” He stops, uncomfortable with the way Baz is staring at him, and shoves his hands deep in his pockets.

It’s something he’s been insecure about since he started to get made fun of for it by the other boys at the home, but it’s also something that he can’t help; similar to the lack of control he has over his own magic. And it  _does_ help. It keeps him distracted from all the stress he’s been put under by the Mage, and right now it’s helping with his problems with Baz.

The rest of the walk back to their room is quiet, only broken by the shouts from the younger students running around outside.

Simon and Baz have never walked up the stairs together, but it’s an awkward experience. The stairway is too narrow for both of them to go side-by-side, so Baz lets Simon go up ahead of him. This only results in Simon becoming hyper aware of the way he’s walking, knowing that Baz has a full view of his ass.

Simon goes into the room first and sits on his bed while Baz changes into shorts and a jersey. Baz is sitting on the floor across from Simon’s bed lacing up his second cleat when Simon decides that it’s now or never, and starts to speak before he can think about what he’s doing. He’s had enough time to think.

“Baz, there’s something I need to tell you.” He looks at Baz, who pauses tying his shoe and looks up at him.

“And what is that?” He raises his eyebrow, but thankfully does so without looking like his usual condescending self. He sits patiently, his knees drawn up against his chest, held there with his arms crossed over them, giving Simon time to gather his thoughts.

“I can’t believe I’m saying this but here goes,” Simon exhales loudly and rubs his sweaty palms on his thighs, “This is going to sound really stupid to you, and you have the right to smack me or whatever you see fit when I’m done telling you, but we’ll have to go into the hall for that. Roommate’s Anathema and all.” He chuckles nervously.

“Stop stalling. You can tell me.” Baz interrupts.

“Fine. I like you. And not in a friend way, or enemy way, whatever we are. In a ‘I wish that we weren’t fake boyfriends kind of way’.” Simon looks anywhere but Baz, eyes trained on the books lining his desk instead. “I know it sounds dumb. How could I like the guy who’s supposed to be my enemy. I mean, we’re supposed to kill each other! And it took me so long to realize, too. A few years of fighting with you, and a whole conversation with Penny before she talked some sense into me. If you want to go in the hallway and beat the shit out of me, maybe throw me down the stairs for old time’s sake, that’s fine.”

Simon is so lost in his rambling that he doesn’t notice Baz has gotten up off the floor until he’s standing right in front of him. Rather than saying anything, he just grabs Simon’s hands and pulls him up so they’re both standing.

Baz is taller than usual because of his cleats, and Simon has to tilt his head up to look him in the eyes.

“Simon, you’re an idiot.” Baz is smiling. More like grinning, actually. It’s kind of scary, all his teeth on display like that.

“I know, you’ve told me.” Simon deflates at the insult and realisation that Baz is holding onto him so he can drag him into the hallway and throw him down the stairs. He deserves it for having feelings like this.

“I don’t think you understand.” His grip on Simon’s wrists tighten, then Baz lets go of one of them. He brings his hand up under Simon’s chin, tilting it up lightly until they’re making eye contact again.

“I’ll show you.” Baz whispers. He closes his eyes and leans in.

Simon is frozen. Baz is kissing him,  _softly_. He thinks that has to be the softest that anyone has ever been kissed. Simon realizes he’s not kissing back, but Baz has already pulled away. Simon uses all the courage he has to wrap his free hand around the back of Baz’s neck, the other one still tight in Baz’s grasp, and pulls him back in.

This time Simon kisses back. It’s definitely not as soft as the first time, either. Even kissing has to be a fight between them; Simon pushing at Baz with all he’s got while Baz does the same.

Baz moves his hand from under Simon’s chin to hold his cheek, and brings the other one up to grip at the nape of his neck. He twirls the short ends of Simon’s hair in his fingers, making Simon sigh into Baz’s mouth.

They finally break apart after what seems like years of kissing and rest their foreheads together. Simon’s hand is spread wide on Baz’s back; they’re pressed against each other and Simon can feel Baz’s hip bone digging into his stomach. He doesn’t care though, he just brings his hand around from Baz’s back and drags it across his stomach. The way Baz’s eyes flutter closed and the sigh he lets out at that prompts Simon to keep doing it.

“Why’d you call me an idiot?” Simon asks.

“Hm?” Baz opens his eyes to look at Simon, “Oh, because you are.” That earns him a light shove on the shoulder, but he just smiles. “I called you an idiot because it amazes me how long it took you to realize I like you.”

“Not fair. I was a little busy trying not to get killed, if you hadn’t noticed.” Simon crosses his arms and fakes an angry look.

“I notice everything about you, Snow.”

“You can call me Simon, you know.” He keeps his arms crossed, but nudges his shoulder forward into Baz’s upper arm.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Baz smirks and brings his hands up to shove back at Simon, and not a light shove. Simon falls back and lands on the bed with a grunt, his arms coming uncrossed to try and brace his landing.

He props himself up on his elbows and watches as Baz follows him onto the bed; swallows thickly when Baz settles on top of his thighs, his cleated feet on either side of Simon’s body.

Baz places his hand next to Simon’s head, the other resting on Simon’s hip, and lowers his body until their faces are only a few inches apart.

“I thought you were going to practice.” Simon can feel Baz’s breath on his face.

“It can wait.” Baz mumbles, before leaning in and closing the distance between him and Simon for the third time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you all so much for reading!! kudos are greatly appreciated :)


End file.
